Friday, October 3, 2008

Friday Funnies

Jane & Arlene are outside their nursing home, having a drink & a smoke, when it starts to rain. Jane pulls out a condom & cuts off the end, puts it over her cigarette & continues to smoke.

Arlene: What in the hell is that?

Jane: A Condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Arlene: Where did you get it?

Jane: You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day Arlene hobbles herself into the local drugstore & announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.
The pharmacist, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind if strangely (she is afterall over 80 years of age), but very delicately asks what brand of condom she prefers.

"Doesn't matter Sonny, as long as it fits on a camel."

The Pharmacist fainted!


I hafta admit, I've felt like this pumpkin a few times in my life!!!

With all that's been goin' on....
I was so depressed lastnight, that I called lifeline.

Got a call center in Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal. They got all excited & asked if I could drive a truck....?

What was that all about?